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stavrizatz
Mukhtar/is
Joined: 20 Feb 2006
Posts: 849
Location: Australia / Lefkosia
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Here is a link that descripes Cyprus better than wikipedia!!!
http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Cyprus
Rated R18+, offensive language towards Turkish Cypriots, unless if you are used to it!
Twisted Quick facts:
official name: Get Some Cyprus
National Anthem: 'Leave you jerks, I mean the Turks'
Capital: 'Mammothreftoupoli' (The land of mother's boys)
Language: It's all Greek to me, with a Cypriot twist
Government: Great
President: Papadopoullos Nose
Poppulation: Enough but less if you don't count the jerks
Area: A few thousand km2 and growing
Population density: 1 Greek per square church and 1 Turk per square mosque
National Heroes: Erolz, Deep Purple
Favourite quotes:
About Cyprus
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| The island of Cyprus (Greek: Κύπρος, Kýpros, 'Ours'; Turkish: Kıbrıs, 'Ours') is the center of all known world. |
National Security
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| Gangsters have even been known get through security and passport checks at the border of Paphos tunnel, which links Paphos to civilisation. |
Politics
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| Cyprus is a centre of international peace and harmony. Apart from some minor political squabbles in the 1930s, 1950s, 1960s, 1970s, 1980s and 1990s, the island has remained afloat and entirely in one piece since its discovery a long, long time ago. |
Economy
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| Cyprus economy depends on British lads, that visit Cyprus holiday resorts for cheap beer, cigarettes. They tend to become stupendously drunk and lose their virginity to something that resembles a woman. |
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| The Cyprus Government has convinced the world public that if they do not donate the money needed to cover the national deficit, Cypriots will resort to eating small vineyard birds known as 'ampelopoulia'. These bird lovers, and especially the European Union are so concerned about the fate of Tweetie that they fork out before the Cypriots get their forks out! |
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Crash Test Dummy
Warnings : 3
Ministerial
Joined: 25 Sep 2005
Posts: 4911
Location: London(ish)
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| self-declared state called Northern Republic of Cyprus, and as such recognized only by Turkey, the Seagull, the Eagle, and other members of the animal kingdom, including various terrorist group. The most famous of these groups is a bunch of transvestite belly dancers who call themselves the Grey Wolves/ Bozkurt in Turkish. |
classic comedy.
great find |
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Crash Test Dummy
Warnings : 3
Ministerial
Joined: 25 Sep 2005
Posts: 4911
Location: London(ish)
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| (also known as pushto ingleso tax) |
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Mete
Warnings : 3
Deputy
Joined: 16 Aug 2005
Posts: 1150
Location: Boston
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These are quite funny.
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What the lads do not know is that the normal prices of cigarettes and alcohol in Cyprus is even cheaper than they think. Cypriot merchants taking full advantage of theit self-created 500% tourist tax (also known as pushto ingleso tax)
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The other cult are the show-offs. They sit at the expensive cafes with their shiny clothes and new hairstyles seeking for people's "simasia"(something mentioned above). When that doesn't happen they lose their reason to live. So they just try harder.
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brother
Warnings : 3
Site Admin
Joined: 15 Aug 2005
Posts: 8920
Location: London/Cyprus
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The one about Turkey is funny too guys,
http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Turkey
Thought this was sooooo funny
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| The inbreeding of Turks and Kurds have produced a sub-group known as the Turds, Turds are to be found almost everywhere in Turkey, especially in political and army circles which are currently awash with Turds of different colors. |
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| Turkish Cypriots - enemies because they're not Turkish enough! |
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Friends
Friends!? What friend are you talking about?
Turks don't have any friends except the Turks! However sexy blond women are always welcome.
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brother
Warnings : 3
Site Admin
Joined: 15 Aug 2005
Posts: 8920
Location: London/Cyprus
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The Greek one is also funny.
http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Greece
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Greece has contributed many things to society that we still use today. Mainly anal sex, olive oil, 4pm porno on standard T.V, George Michael (who is by the way, very gay-this explains the connection).
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Greeks and Turks seem to fight over everything in general, while the most popular topics seem to be football, yoghurt and baklava, a dessert so filled with sugar that it might turn deadly when consumed in large amounts. Because both nations well know they'll get really, really bored if they don't fight with each other on any platform possible, the national sport of both countries have lately been posting stupid videos on Youtube, which mainly consist of curses constructed in really bad grammar. The traditional theme of the videos is generally mothers (from each side) getting gangbanged, and surprisingly, goat fucking. Noone knows how interspecies sex can be that big of an insult, but it apparently is a taboo for the youth of both nations. Youtube fights are held every week between teams of, say, Panteli5^^TheKiller and YoungTurkishWolf86, and the game is continued until one of the teams pass out on the keyboard.
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stavrizatz
Mukhtar/is
Joined: 20 Feb 2006
Posts: 849
Location: Australia / Lefkosia
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Yes Bro, those ones are good as well
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